The Love Listeners Inc.

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The Love Listeners Inc.

A team of relationship experts with over 30 years of experience combined, dedicated to assisting all

04/08/2021

The reason why we are always harping about accountability is because without it you will continue to repeat old cycles.

When we started to ask ourselves "why am i learning this lesson again"? It became crystal clear that we were participating in our own misery, a matter of fact, we were creating it by choosing not to take accountability for our actions or inactions.

Here's what we've learned, ignoring the truth won't make it not true, and sticking your head in the sand won't make anything go away. All it does is blind you to your way forward.

Wisdom: when you decide to take accountability you will be equal parts frustrated, annoyed, and grateful. Frustrated and annoyed because you had been ignoring the truth all along, causing yourself unnecessary misery and probably some mental anguish. Then grateful that you will not have to relearn the lessons. Life is going to keep coming at you, and people are going to test what you say you have resolved, therefore, be a person of good character and build a personal code of ethics. Then let no one come between you and your word(especially to yourself) no matter how hard it may be. You come first...period. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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02/08/2021

To be clear...

Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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29/07/2021

...especially the flaws. We have come to understand that a lot of people have an impractical idea of love. As far as we are concerned it is expected that you pick a partner that is good to you, that is obvious. It is the flaws that will make or break your relationship.

Don't get into relationships expecting things to be seamless. That said, don't go into relationships looking for whats wrong. Go in with a healthy understanding of yourself and what you need to feel good with another.

Recommendation: pick a partner whose flaws are tolerable for you. Sometimes the good can outweigh the bad but, the one bad outweighs the all the good, causing such an unbalance that the relationship just can't work. Do yourself a favour and do the work. Your mental health will thank you for it later. Do the work. Trust the process my loves....
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27/07/2021

All of the attributes listed are very important, however, #1 is the most. If you do not have the willingness to love and be loved the rest will have less of an impact.

You may be thinking to yourself, of course I know how to be loved... but are you sure about that? Authentic love is a mirror. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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www.thelovelisteners.com

23/07/2021

The person that is right for you will mirror what needs to be addressed in your world, they come in and adjust your outlook on love, life and relationships. They will elevate you, and help you become the best version of yourself. Their job isn't to sugarcoat everything for you, that's what the good man/woman is for. That said, unfortunately, the good ones rarely last because they rarely inspire change in you. They are the ones that when asked what you love about them your answer consists of all the things they do for you with a hint of guilt because you haven't done the same for them. Note: if nothing in your world changes for the better because of them, they are good to you but not necessarily good for you.

Wisdom: pick the one that causes a shift in your life. The one that by their mere presence intimidates the bu****it, the one that motivates you to understand things differently (teaches you), the one that makes you want to be better and do better is the right one. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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22/07/2021

The most important thing to understand is relationships are about a series of decisions, decisions that can make or break your partnership. Everyday your someone is going to be relying on you to make sound decisions for you and them. This is the importance of owning a healed, healthy, and peaceful heart. Do the work. Trust the process...
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21/07/2021

We think this statement is true for both men and women.

The moral of the story is, anything that you focus your attention on breeds results. Focus and results go hand in hand. Therefore, if you focus on love in all areas of your life, you will find it. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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15/07/2021

There is a difference between starting over and starting from scratch. Both are empowering, however, there is something special about starting over.

The beauty of starting from scratch is you get to build something from the ground up. You get to pioneer something you've never done before. It can be exciting and fun.

Then there is starting over, starting over puts you in a unique position. The beauty of starting over is now you have wisdom and you're working with experience. You have valuable insight on how you want to build something differently than you had before. You can spot pitfalls and avoid them, it's the an unfair advantage your trauma or your blessings (which ever you were fortunate enough to get) affords you.

Bottom line is never be afraid to start over or start something from scratch. Both are designed to help you become...do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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15/07/2021

Wisdom: be particular and intentional about the people and situations you allow in your life. If they do not prioritize peace in their own lives, it's fair to assume that they won't respect your boundaries or your bid for peace.

In the "me"antime, master your peace. Once you have it, fight to the death to nuture and protect it. It's that valuable. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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12/07/2021

You have to be able to offer what you're looking for. A relationship without reciprocity is doomed to fail. Every single attribute that you are looking for you must possess.
Reciprocity is how you teach people how to love you. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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07/07/2021

Life hack: forgive your past, speak life into your future, try to worry less, and when given the opportunity to love someone love them deep regardless of the outcome. Because love is for you. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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02/07/2021

Love will change your life...Period.
Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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01/07/2021

It's perfectly fine if you don't want love in your life, it's YOUR life. However, if you're under the impression that no good comes from love, it's our job as love ambassadors and good stewards to provide you with the other side. You can meet your match, the imperfect person that fits you like a glove, and their flaws tolerable to you. We've seen people's lows match their highs. Meaning; what they once thought was the worst, they now think is the best. Why? Because they didn't quit on themselves.

We understand that it is difficult to stay optimistic when you're not seeing results to your effort. This is the importance of "doing the work". You will find it much easier to meet love when you are working on yourself. Loving on yourself will give you patience on your journey. You have to be ready for what you're asking for or you will blow it. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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01/07/2021

Our experiences have taught us that a lot of relationships can be saved and divorces avoided if the little things are tended to.

If you love someone and want them to be a constant in your life, then it would behoove you to make it a point to pay attention to the little things. The little things will reveal likes, dislikes, strengths, weaknesses, needs and desires. All of which culminate to make your relationships worth "your" while. Remember, the little things always proceed the big things. Pay attention. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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23/06/2021

"You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly."
—Sam Keen

Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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21/06/2021

Learning about what you need to be at your best with another will be worth your while. You'll become very intentional with your time and the time of others. It is much easier to respect someone else's time and effort when you respect your own. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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18/06/2021

If your daily diet consists mainly of what is wrong with life, love and relationships, your life and relationships will reflect that. You aren't just what you eat, you are also what you think.

May we submit for your consideration; think more about the things you want and less about the things you don't want. Bad thoughts and things will come your way, however, it's up to you to not let them take over. It will be hard for you to get what you want if you never try. Do not allow people that do not want what you want to discourage you out of your hopes and dreams.

Pay attention to your circle. If the people you surround yourself with and listen to think negatively about life and love, chances are their negative energy will transfer to you. It's a thing. Change starts with you. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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17/06/2021

Here are some healing and life hacks that have worked for us:

Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn't know. Sometimes life can make you feel stupid for not getting it sooner. Everyone grows at their own pace. You aren't in competition with anyone. That said, some will be in competition with you, know the difference.

Apologize when you are wrong. Forgive even if they don't deserve your forgiveness, because forgiveness is for you, not them. Forgiveness is the best way to let anything go.

Be accountable for your actions and decision-making, because if you don't you will miss the lesson. Accountability offers peace.

Focus on quality over quantity. Lots don't equal better.

Let go of the extra baggage. It is holding down, and It's damn near impossible to soar with a boulder on your back.

Acknowledge your limits. However, if your limits keep you confined to your comfort zone, push past at least one. You'll learn something new about yourself.

When you are doing the work it is much easier to trust the process.
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14/06/2021

"Love is content with the present; it hopes for the future and it doesn't brood over the past. It is the day-in and out chronicles of irritations, problems, compromises, small disappointments, big victories and common goals. If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things that you lack. If you don't have it, no matter what else is there, it isn't enough."

Ann Landers

We have personally witnessed people find the love of their life. Therefore, we can tell you with complete confidence and conviction, you have not truly experienced life if you have never loved or been loved. Love is essential. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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12/06/2021

Although sidestepping responsibility may feel good in the short term, it will be crippling to you in the long term.

If you are under the delusion that you didn't play a role in the demise of your relationships, you are harming your future relationships, and you are setting yourself up for failure.

Ever wonder why your results are the same?

Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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12/06/2021

Love is a process, and if you "do the work", you'll be able to trust it.
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10/06/2021

It’s always a good idea to examine whether your expectations are reasonable and or unrealistic.

First of all, let us acknowledge that it can be difficult to pinpoint an exact reason why things aren’t working out without understanding your history. In any case, remember that you are not a lost cause. We’ve witnessed daters experience massive comes backs once they took responsibility for their outcomes.

Here are a few things to consider during your examination:

• Are you clear about who you are and what you value? It’s important to understand that value doesn’t have a look. Often people will say they want certain attributes but then dismiss the person that meets them because they don’t look like said attributes. Again, values don’t have a look. We are by no means sharing that you should pick people that you aren’t attracted to, however, be reasonable.

• Manage your checklist. Is your checklist a mile long? Consider that sometimes the right person for you might not check every box but is willing to learn and grow with you, and sometimes the person that checks all your boxes isn’t.

• Are you unfairly judging people based on your past relationships? Hopefully, you’ve reflected on your history and dealt with some of your insecurities before putting yourself out in the dating world. That said, we are humans and everything can’t be dealt with all at once. Meaning, new situations can bring up old hurt. However, remember to put things in perspective. For example; if in the past you felt neglected when your ex didn’t respond quickly enough, don’t assume the same thing is happening in the new. It could just be that they are busy and they don’t want to reach out until they can dedicate adequate time for you. Don’t jump to conclusions, and communicate well.

You are never going to meet a perfect person, they aren’t always going to do and say things in the manner you expect, so stop expecting people to do things your way. You have no idea how things will turn out without giving yourself and others a fair shot. Do the work. Trust the process my loves…
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10/06/2021

In the famous words of the late great poet Maya Angelou...

"Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time." Keep doing the work until it's your last time.
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08/06/2021

Love, life and relationship guidance: always be mindful of the decisions you make. Every single one of them will cause a chain reaction. It's important to always keep the outcome you seek at the forefront of your mind.

It is also beneficial to remember that people will always remember how you treat/treated them, it will never go away. They also tend to hang on to negative thoughts and feelings even after you've tried to replace them. It's a consequence.

You may not be able to do anything about yesterday but you can do something about today. Therefore, be kind, be deliberate and thoughtful with your words and actions. Never let the one you love feel unloved. Mindfulness is a great cognitive exercise. Try it. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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04/06/2021

😁😉 Happy Friday lovers. We hope ya'll have an awesome wknd.
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03/06/2021

Here's the deal ladies, a man that is interested in getting to know you because he "sees" a potential mate in you will want to spend non-s*xual time with you. This is his way of investigating a relationship with you. Typically for them, an ideal relationship is one where there is genuine friendship along with s*x and exclusivity. A good man knows what he wants and values himself.

You need to understand that men do develop feelings for women that they aren't having s*x with. The odds tip heavily in your favour if he is making a conscious "decision" to wait and get to know you - aka - he is "deciding" to develop feelings for you.

How to know if he's decided on you?

His actions will align with his words. Men are very action-oriented so if he is not proving his words with actions, chances are he doesn't see you past a certain place in his life. That is ok. If you try to push past his intentions for you, you will likely end up heartbroken.

Just because he doesn't see a future with you doesn't make him a bad guy, and you not worthy. It's more likely that he is a man that knows what he wants. Pay attention to actions, listen to what he is saying to you, and what he's not. Adjust accordingly. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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01/06/2021

It is not a coincidence that Maslow's theory of human needs lists love, belonging, and s*xual intimacy as the third most important of human needs. Only behind the very obvious food, shelter, and safety. Maslow's theory is to achieve a certain level of self-actualization you need the safety of shelter, employment, food, love, and intimacy.

His ideas lend themselves to our theory that without love and affection it's hard to feel full in life. Nonetheless, like we always state, the love that one needs to feel fulfilled must first come from oneself, then be shared with another.

You will have no idea how to truly love another if you have never experienced it for yourself. So, we say all of that to say, if you want to find true love, you have to start on common ground. You have to know what love is. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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31/05/2021

Relationship talk • How to keep a woman happy. Tip - it ain't money.

It's always beneficial to listen in on the opposite s*x discuss their views on relationships. However, keep in mind, not all men are made equal. 😉
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31/05/2021

*Disclaimer*
Adult dialogue.

If you want to preserve your relationship, do not use s*x to oppress, punish, submit into obedience or belittle your man. Sexual intimacy is a massive part of a relationship. It is what keeps you close as a unit. It is a gift. A purposeful soul tie that is shared with someone you love. Sexual intimacy should not be thrown around and or used as a weapon. It should be respected as a means to express love.

Fellas, women are quite aware of your carnal needs and most women try to meet them. Nonetheless, you need to remember and understand that women have God-given ebbs and flows that cause us not to be able to always be on-demand. If you notice that her stretches are lasting longer, it's conversation time. When your woman is not "willing" to have s*x with you there is an underlining problem that is being overlooked. There is a difference between not feeling like it right now and an unwillingness. How to know the difference? The unwillingness typically comes with an attitude. Pay attention to her.

Ladies, may we put in for your consideration that the times when "you're not in the mood" due to the kids, work, stress etc...making love to your man may aid in your recovery. Making love is a great stress reliever.

Our philosophy is, the more you stay in each other, the deeper your bond will grow. Do yourselves a favour and prioritize making love. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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"The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband. Likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife."
1 Corinthians 7:3-4

30/05/2021

Love is a decision. If you want love to thrive in your life, then you have to make a series of decisions every day that will encourage love to grow.

We are in a time where showing and sharing love is so crucial. We implore you to do your part. Share love with others, speak kindly and offer assistance.

We decided in 2015 that we were going to be the change we want to see in this world, and we've never looked back. As a result, we've gained so much more peace and compassion. Choose to feed love in your life, it will change your world and the people in it. Do the work. Trust the process my loves...
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Relationship talk • How to keep a woman happy. Tip - it ain't money. It's always beneficial to listen in on the opposite sex discuss their views on relationships. However, keep in mind, not all men are made equal. 😉 #loveyoumeanit💋💋

Take advice from the people that have been navigating it for a long time. Between patience being so thin and divorces being so easy, the people that choose to stay and work it out understand something differently. The road isn't going to be easy but if the right person is chosen, and two people are committed to making it work, it works. *PSA* Your single never been in a relationship or bitterly divorced friends and family aren't the ones you should be taking relationship advice from. Not everyone is good at critical thinking. Do the work. Trust the process my loves... #loveyoumeanit💋💋 #lovelisteners #beyourownmatchmaker #relationshipcoach #perspectivecoach #lovecoach #matchmakers #experts #relationships #healthyrelationships #changinglivesforthebetter #lovegoals #blacklivesmatter🥂

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