19/05/2024
I witnessed something that broke my heart this afternoon.
I went to pick up my son's PS which was at a repair shop and as I was leaving, I heard someone shouting my name so I turned and behold, it was an old friend from way back. He has an electronics showroom around the plaza and was doing well for himself.
He insisted that I should come and see his showroom and catch up on old times, so I obliged him.
While we were sitting at one corner of the showroom where he had an office table and chairs, he called someone who I thought was one of his boys to come and buy drinks for us.
I didn't pay attention when the guy arrived until he also called my name. I looked up, lo and behold, it was another mutual friend of ours. The three of us practically grew up together in the same street.
We exchanged pleasantries, and he handed the guy some money to buy drinks, but something was amiss with the way he was dishing out instructions and order to the guy.
The guy, too, was also cowering and answering YES SIR, YES SIR.
I felt somehow, but I held my peace as I tried to process what I was witnessing cos I didn't know what was actually happening or what arrangement they have.
When the guy came back with the drinks, he dropped the drinks and tried to exchange banters with me. He was asking about my family and all but to my shock, the guy who owns the showroom harshly asked him to go and start bringing in the sound systems outside as it is almost time to pack as it was almost closing time.
The guy answered YES SIR and left
I looked at my phone and the time was 3:44pm. The market closes around 5pm - 5:30pm.
When the guy left, I asked him what was going on and he went on a very long rant about how the guy has become parasitic and useless. He claimed that he has been feeding the guy and his family for almost two years and paying their house rent.
He told me that the guy went to China, spent 6 years and couldn't make money so he came back koboless and begged him for assistance so he decided to help him by teaching him his electronics business. He also claimed that he intend to give him some money to start up after 4 years.
I was shocked. 4 years teaching (servitude) means that it was more like an apprenticeship. I wanted to asked him some questions but having an understanding of the mindset of his type. I held my peace.
To say I was sad was an understatement. This young man who is now reduced to a servant was a giver and should be about 4-5 years older than us. Way back, he was always the one buying us food at CKC whenever we go to play football. He was also the one paying for us whenever we went to play TV games at a nearby game house.
This fella kept on ranting and talking down on the guy. He kept hammering on how he paid house rent and give pocket money.
I couldn't stomach it any more so I gave him a piece of my mind.
He told me to remember that he doesn't owe the guy anything. That he is only helping him.
From my perspective, You don't have to humiliate your friend because you want to help him. A man's ego and self worth is very important to his overall well-being. This is the major reason why you see most benefactors complaining of people who they helped becoming ungrateful when they finally stand on their feet.
People can eventually forget what you did for them but will never forget how you made them feel. Every wise human being knows this about human nature.
Paying rent and feeding his family is good and commendable but you don't have to take away the dignity of a man who is your friend in the process.
He didn't seem to understand what I was saying but I made sure I made my point and left.
I couldn't bear to take a drink that was bought under such condition by a man who was supposed to be my friend. I only collected both their numbers and left.
It is indeed a cold world out there.
See, In our world today, You want to know your real friends?
Fall sick, lose your job, end up in jail, go broke, become poor over an extended period or die.
That's when you'll realize God is the only friend you have.
Gen. Sani Abacha is a villian in Nigerian political history today and his legacy tainted not because he was the most corrupt but because of the kind of friends he kept. Friends and allies who failed to protect his legacy behind his back.
Aside Al Mustapha, every other friend, soldier and political ally Abacha ever had failed him in death.
I can authoritatively assert that many of our so called elder states men and past heads of state actually stole more than Abacha did. The only difference is that they stayed alive to protect their loot and their legacy hence they are angels today and Abacha is the devil.
In all your accomplishments in life, seek loyal friends who have conscience.
I have seen friends turn their backs on friends because he/she no longer measure up.
I have seen people turn their friends into servants simply because the friend went broke and needed help.
I have seen people demand to sleep with their widow of their deceased friends before rendering help simply because the friend died and left very little to sustain the widow and the kids on the long term.
For no tangible reason, I have seen people who didn't even bother to attend the burial of their deseased friends who shared their lives with them and crossed mountains for them.
When in a position of power and authority, please make sure you use your means and capabilities to genuinely impact people around you positively but don't expect anything in return because we live in a very wicked world full of people with dubious amnesia.
Don't be such a friend that turns into an abusive boss and downgrades his/her friends to servants simply because you are now in a position to help.
Don't be that friend that derives joy in sleeping with the wives of your broke friends and allies.
You musnt humiliate people or take advantage of people before assisting them. Hold your peace and assistance instead. It is more honourable.
Don't be that friend that always want something in return before you render a helping hand.
Don't be that friend that turn his back on the family of a late friend or the kind that demands to sleep with the wives of friends before helping out.
Life is transient
In all you do, always remember that we are all on borrowed time.
💓🥱🤝.
I remain my humble self
T&G 📺 Tv💕
