02/07/2024
DIETER'S PRAYER
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me lie down and do push ups. He giveth me the Hollywood bread. He restoreth my waistline. He leadeth me past the refrigerator for my own sake. He maketh me partake of the green beans instead of potatoes. He leadeth me past the pizzeria. Yea, though I walk through the bakery, I shall not falter, for thou art with me. Thy Tab and Fresca, they comfort me. Thou preparest a diet for me in the presence of mine enemies. Thou anointest my lettuce with low cal oil. My cup will not overflow. Surely Rye-Krisp and D-Zerta shall follow me all the days of my lives, and I will live with the pains of hunger forever. Amen. By Karen Moser