28/07/2021
Cali and I returned to Gympanzees , the pop up activity centre for disabled children today, and I can't tell you how good it felt.
Pulling into the carpark and seeing other families wheeling, or lifting, their children out of their cars and strapping on hefty bags of medical equipment to themselves and the wheelchairs filled me with such a sense of belonging.
We all have so many roles in life; partner, parent, sister, brother, carer, employee, employer...and we often connect to others through our shared experience in these roles. My role as mother to a non-verbal, medically complex little girl, is not one that I feel I can share with many people, but when I go to the Butterfly sessions at Gympanzees, I find myself around people who have faced many of the same things as Cody and I have, and whose daily minutiae actually matches ours.
And it feels so good to be able to share the minutiae about tubes and meds without any explanation needed. It feels so relaxing to be with people who also live with the complexities, heartbreak, hysteria and hilarity of having a delicate and different child.
I still drive Cali to school twice a week, which takes a great chunk of my childfree time, in part because of how much I treasure the snatched chats in the playground with parents and carers, as we hastily exchange tips and empathy. Even a smile and a wave from another parent or carer as we pass in a car means so much to me. Sometimes I think this is quite sad, it certainly makes me realise how lonely I can feel in this aspect of my life.
Gympanzees is such a special place, because no matter what your child's disability, there is a session for them to attend. And because when I am there, Cali and myself are valued and our community is valued. All the volunteers and staff are so kind, accommodating and genuine.
When I was thinking about this (and well done if you are still reading) I realised that this is what I want for the families that stay in Iris. I want them to feel like they, and their child are valued, and that we will do our best to accommodate their needs without fuss or comment. The welcome I have received at Gympanzees is something I have internalised and want to pass on.
AND I was so proud to see they'd chosen this picture of Cali, from a former visit back in the pre-pandemic world, for one of their welcoming posters!