Earldom of Harbledown

  • Home
  • Earldom of Harbledown

Earldom of Harbledown Following the United Kingdom's decision to leave the EU, the Earldom of Harbledown declared independence and stated its intention to remain in the EU.

Twinned with Handforth Parish Council. The 12th Earl, from his stately manor within the borders of the Earldom, loosely defined as being the A2050 to the north and the orchards at the bottom of his garden to the south, has declared UDI and welcomed all the inhabitants of Harbledown as his loyal subjects. Construction of a wall to better define the boundary than the current line of orange cones, ha

s also begun. Applications for Earldom of Harbledown (EoH) passports by UK citizens claiming Harbledown ancestry has surged and the queue is now almost six months for processing to be conducted.

25/10/2022

EVENTS

While the uneasy standoff across the barricade dividing ‘West’ and ‘East’ Harbledown continues, the spotlight has shifted to the United Nations in New York. Here, a number of other ‘smaller’ countries, including Liechtenstein, Monaco and Timor-Leste have met to see if there is sufficient backing for a UN resolution to declare support for the current regime in the Earldom of Harbledown and denouncing the rebels. However, with China backing the uprising and declaring their recognition of the rival administration, their permanent seat on the Security Council and associated veto makes any expedient progress unlikely.
On the ground, the loyalists remain camped outside The Earl’s Summer Hill Palace awaiting news. Their occupation of The 12th Earl Public House and, in particular, the telephone box with its associated internet connection, are key at this time. On the other side of the barricade the Chinese-backed rebels declared this morning’s solar eclipse an omen of portent for both The Earl and for his supporters.

24/10/2022

LATEST

Further dramatic developments in the Earldom of Harbledown today as the rebels occupying the area around the Post Office Stores and the fire-damaged remains of the bus stop have declared UDI, proclaiming “The People’s Republic of West Harbledown”. In an even more shocking move China has already recognised the rebels as the legitimate government of Harbledown and are rumoured to be preparing to despatch a delegation. The loyalists, still camped opposite the Earl’s Summer Hill Palace have been waiting forlornly for an appearance of the 12th Earl, but as yet none has been forthcoming. There is an uneasy standoff at the fruit box barricade forming the de facto border, and one can't help wondering if ‘West Harbledown’ receives substantial material Chinese backing, then can the loyalists in ‘East Harbledown’ hold out without the support of their leader?

23/10/2022

LIVE 19:50 HST
A day of relative calm in the Earldom has followed a night of dramatic events. In front of The Earl’s Summer Hill Palace a large group of loyalists clutching jars of Piccalilli aloft have been singing in support of The Earl and imploring him to appear on his balcony with his flag to prove to them that he is still in residence and has not fled into tax exile, as has been rumoured. Further down the hill another group have carved a giant likeness of The Earl from a pile of cauliflowers, rather reminiscent in style of the ‘Goddess of Democracy’ from the Tiananmen Square protests, surrounded by football scarves and scented candles.
On the other side of the barricade of fruit boxes, the rebels have been plotting their next moves. At lunchtime, a number of them roasted one of The Earl’s albino peacocks in the churchyard, which was then served up with a smörgåsbord of b***y ceased from the occupied Post Office Stores and later a ‘People’s Executive’ was formed with a view to overthrowing The Earl’s regime and setting up a republic in its place.
For now, as the rain falls, there is an uneasy standoff between the two groups, the odour of damp burnt peacock hangs heavily in the air and it is impossible to say which way events might turn next.

23/10/2022

Thank you for joining us, we’re bringing you live updates from The Earldom of Harbledown where there are rumours that The 12th Earl has fled the Earldom and is currently in exile, possibly somewhere in the UK.
The sky above this tiny enclave of hope, itself surrounded by a troubled kingdom, is as yet barely tinged with the grey streaks of dawn, yet this has been a night of fast-moving events. Loyalists, gripped by rumours that the Earl departed yesterday, possibly on the number 3 bus, countered by talk that he is still holed up in Summer Hill Palace, perhaps hiding in the bath, have made their base at The 12th Earl public house. From there, the BBC’s Clive Myrie, sheltering in the pub’s cellar, has reported on events throughout the night. There has been violence; the bus stop was ransacked and the timetable burned down, Piccalilli Advocaat Cocktails have been thrown. The rebels, who would like to see The Earl overthrown, have set up a barricade of fruit boxes across the pavement and have occupied the Post Office Stores, where the greetings cards display has been torched and graffiti of poor grammatical construct sprayed. Outside the Post Office flies their banner; the majestic green and cream rising-cauliflower flag of The Earldom, but with its central motif crudely cut-out, leaving a ragged hole. From there, the BBC’s foreign correspondant Lyse Doucet, herself no stranger to the World’s trouble spots, has been seen wearing a blue steel helmet and hoping to secure an interview with the rebels, to establish their intensions.
For the moment the streets are calm, but the atmosphere is as a tightly coiled spring and one senses at any moment this tiny Earldom could once again unravel with highly-charged events. Stayed tuned for further coverage.

22/10/2022

There are rumours afoot that The Earl has fled the Earldom and is currently in exile. Residents with flaming torches are on the streets and windows have been broken at the Post Office Stores and souvenir tins of fudge bearing the Earl's portrait ransacked. Clive Myrie has been spotted wearing a flack-jacket with a camera crew in attendance. We await further updates. Stay safe.

Address


Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when Earldom of Harbledown posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

  • Address
  • Alerts
  • Claim ownership or report listing

  • Want your business to be the top-listed Travel Agency?

Share