15/07/2024
A “TAIL” OF TWO DOGS
Although It was late and I was very tired, I had one last duty to fulfill before retiring to bed.
To remind me of that duty, my two irredeemable dogs, “River” and “Willow” were whining at the back door ready to begin their late night perimeter inspection.
“River” is my big girl. She is an intelligent and stunning brunette of mixed heritage (American Bulldog, Boxer and Mastiff). Between our two dogs, she is the “brains” and the “muscle” of the operation.
Conversely, armed only with baby teeth and an earsplitting, high-pitched bark, “Willow” is the tagalong, rescue pup who serves as “hero support” for her larger companion. Her fifty-pound scraggly blonde frame is supported by four funny-looking legs, and positioned between a long, wonky nose and a crookedly bent tail.
Barefooted and clad in a big bath robe, I eased out of my recliner and shuffled my way to the back door to unleash the two mongrels into the night.
As soon as I cracked the door open, both exuberant canines disappeared into the pitch-black darkness.
While they were outside, I flipped on the news and took the time to set up the coffee maker for the next day. Afterwards, I started to head off to brush my teeth. It was about that time that it occurred to me that the dogs should have already returned to the porch.
I opened the back door and let out my patented shrill whistle to no avail. I could neither see nor hear them.
So, I grabbed a spotlight and carefully walked outside.
The summer air was still heavy and sticky. There was not a star or moon to be seen in the sky. Combined with the unusual quietness that surrounded me…it felt unusually eerie.
Holding the spotlight up, I began to scan the back fence line. Then I trained the light on the barn…even shining it below my big, flatbed trailer. But, there were no familiar eyes glowing back at me…only silence…and nothingness.
That is when I heard the CRASH.
Spinning around, I trained the light on a nearby shrub bed. There was River…my ponderous protector…hurtling away from me as she pursued what surely was some terrible and vile creature.
Scattered on the ground in her clumsy wake, was my newly deceased…birdbath.
Behind its blue ceramic remains, were other victims of the chase; a shattered rain gauge and barely enough left of a terra cotta planter to identify the body.
No longer quiet, I could hear River’s deep, guttural bark as she engaged her ferocious quarry…and based on the proximity of her battle cry…the “war” was headed my way!
What kind of nefarious beast had she found lurking in the shadows?
Shocked speechless, with trembling hands, I pointed the light out in front of me. Bending slightly at the knees and digging my toes into the grass…I tried to ready myself as I considered the fate of that innocent planter.
Cloaked in darkness, the chaos was closing in, and all that separated it from me now was a stand of overgrown Chinese Privets…and one diseased rose bush.
I stopped breathing as the hedge in front of me began shaking violently. It seemed the branches themselves were letting out a high-pitched other-worldly scream.
“ARRRRFFFFFFFFEEEEEEP!!!”
Out popped “HERO SUPPORT!”
Curly-tailed tucked, panicked and confused, she immediately scrambled underneath my robe for safety.
Fear gripped us both, as right behind her, the HIDEOUS BEAST …the TERROR IN THE NIGHT…burst forth from the bushy barrier and out into the light!
Covered in fur with two massive teeth jutting from its gaping jaws, the floppy-horned fiend began to…wait a second…THAT’S A RABBIT!
It was a small one with ears twice the size of its tiny body. Its face looked like it belonged on the cover of a children’s book.
Before I could even begin to fully processing this…
“KABOOM!”
Like an enraged hippo…River exploded onto the scene overshooting the bouncing bunny and landing against the bbq grill.
Stunned, it took my “big girl” a moment to reacquire the target…and by that time, it was too late.
Her momentary disorientation was all the help the cute cottontail had needed to make its final escape.
Just like that, it was over.
Other than some heavy breathing and racing hearts, quiet returned to the night.
Threat removed, “the muscle” stretched her long body and vigorously shook off the dust and dirt from her smooth coat.
With her hackles lowered, she padded up to Willow and I. After giving her smaller companion a few apologetic licks on the face, she sat back on her haunches, raised her right paw and gave me her best…”I’m sorry I wrecked the place” look.
Smiling, I graciously grasped her beefy paw in my right hand. I accepted her apology for the collateral damage and thanked her for her heroism.
No doubt, as I looked down at Willow’s extensive nose sticking out from underneath the hem of my robe, River (at least in her own mind) had protected us tonight.
Not her first rodeo, she has protected us in the past from evil couch cushions, dangerous remote controls and an unscheduled pool cleaning guy named Bill.
So, beware all you terrors of the night, denizens of the dark, possums, rabbits and squirrels. Choose your haunts carefully here in Ellis County. For the mighty “River” and the watchful “Willow” stand at the ready against all that dare to threaten the realm.
Well, River is ready…Willow is still hiding underneath my bathrobe.
From Hall (1.15) Acres…
Midlothian, Texas…
Please have a good day.
Greg T. Hal
