Rethabise Premium Guest Lodge

14/04/2019

07/03/2017

Portia

18/01/2017

The art of meeting your highest expectation.

18/01/2017

we pride ourselves in making our guests feel at home

18/01/2017

18/01/2017

We also host events. Please mail [email protected] should you need more info or call us at 056 212 2151. You can also visit our website at www.rethabise.co.za

18/01/2017

The art of meeting your highest expectation.

18/01/2017

18/01/2017

29 Klein Schmidt Street, Elandia, Kroonstad.
Tel: 056 212 2151
Cell: 079 465 6650
eMail: info@reth

18/11/2015

https://t.co/qn36216SZc

28/05/2015

"The riot squad was called out when a pitched battle developed during a wedding in Napples. The bride fainted and eleven guests had to be taken to hospital by ambulances. The trouble started when the two sets of in-laws could not agree who should be photographed first together with the newly-weds."
Walter Kanitz from Speaker's book

16/04/2015

She was sixteen, he was seventeen, and the parents were opposed to their wedding. But they couldn't prevent it without making s secure, so they agreed to it. When the officiating clergyman asked the bridegroom to repeat after him. "With all my wordly goods I thee endow," his father nudged his wife and whispered. "There goes his motor scooter."

15/01/2015

Happy groom: "Oh my little snuggle bunny I'm so proud that you've agreed to be my wife! Just think you'll be putting up with my ugly old mug for the rest of my life."

His new bride: "Don't worry, honey - most days you'll be out at work until!" it gets dark

02/01/2015

You still have a chance to bring your family and have fun this summer. Our 40% discount is still on untill end of January 2015.

18/12/2014

10/08/2014

"Due to misunderstanding over the telephone we stated that the couple would live at the home of the bridegroom's father. We have been asked to point out that they in fact live at the Old Manse."

09/08/2014

"Young farmer with one hundred acres would be pleased to hear from young lady with tractor. Please send photograph of tractor."

08/08/2014

MISPRINTS

Mr. and Mrs. Simon Peters
request the honour
of your presents
at the marriage of their daughter Eve
to Mr. James Johnson

07/08/2014

Small girl: "Daddy why do people have sixteen marriage partners?"
Father: "Whatever gave you that idea?"
Small girl: "At cousin Sarah's wedding the vicar said they could have sixteen partners - four better, four worse, four richer and four poorer."

06/08/2014

WEDDING VOWS

"Vows are exchanged at every wedding. Although the words have been uttered millions of time, no one ever gets them right:
*You say Í do 'when it's not your turn.
*You mispronounce your spouse's name.
*You mispronounce your name.
*You don't mispronounce anyone's name, because you're too terrified to pronounce anything.
There are two defences against the embarrassment of fumbled vows. One is an extremely loud organist. The other is elopement."

05/08/2014

"Which reminds me of the story of a best man who was asked to read from the Bible as part of his speech 1 John 4:18 'There is not fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear.''
Unfortunately, he read from the Gospel of John 4:18, where it says "You have had five husbands, and he whom you now have is not your husband!'"

04/08/2014

THE BEST LAID PLANS...

At a village wedding the vicar gave out the final hymn:
"Hymn number 540." There was no response from the organist who had turned around towards the vicar and shook his head at him.

The vicar, knowing something was amiss, looked at his sheet.

"Sorry," he said, "hymn number 520. 'Love divine, all love excelling'." Hymn number 540 was 'Fight the good fight with all thy might'.

03/08/2014

When planning their wedding the young couple asked their vicar if he approved of s*x before marriage.
"Certainly not!," came the reply, "it would delay the service."

02/08/2014

The Hollywood film actress was getting married for the seventh time when the clergyman stumbled over the words of the ceremony.
"It's all right," hissed the actress. "Take it again from the top of page five."

01/08/2014

The elderly minister became confused at the wedding service because of the groom's long hair.
Then he smiled and said: "Äh, will one of you please kiss the bride.
-Roy Bolitho-

31/07/2014

"Ä Yugoslavian man arranged to elope with his young girlfriend and, as they'd planned, spirited her away from her home, wrapped in a blanket.

He put her in his car and drove speedily away.

Only after he was some miles away did he stop to greet his beloved - but when he pulled the blanket back he discovered that he'd abducted her seventy-three-year-old grandmother.

What's more the old lady took advantage of his state of shock to beat him up!"