Unofficial City of Murray, KY

06/05/2024

Well hopefully the Calloway County humane society doesn’t name their animals after drugs. IFYKYK

06/04/2024

We wish a very uncomfortable pride month for the bigots 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

05/30/2024

These people asking when power would be back on earlier this week must be the same people who ask when the storm will hit their street when WPSD is live.

05/30/2024

While we may not have a dildoer like Paducah, we do have a fry burglar.

05/30/2024

Judging by the trajectory of the moon and the sun, probably sometime between now and 4th of July.

05/30/2024

Anyone wanna get serenaded at Walmart with us? Serious offers only.

05/30/2024

Bring an umbrella, it’s gonna be a sh*tstorm 😂

05/23/2024

You know you’re from the south when you think it’s one of those jail ankle monitors, and not this new fangled permanent jewelry.

05/21/2024

confrontation Escalates: Karen's Altercation at Murray Walmart

In a recent incident at the Murray Walmart, tensions escalated as a confrontation involving a woman identified as Karen took place. Witnesses reported that the altercation began over a disagreement regarding a perceived queue-jumping incident at the checkout counter.

According to eyewitnesses, Karen became increasingly agitated when another customer allegedly cut in line. Despite attempts by store staff to diffuse the situation, Karen reportedly became verbally abusive, demanding immediate action to rectify the perceived injustice.

As the situation escalated, Karen's frustration turned physical, resulting in a brief scuffle with the other customer. Store security intervened swiftly, managing to separate the individuals involved before the altercation could escalate further.

Local authorities were called to the scene, but by the time they arrived, the situation had been resolved, and both parties had left the premises. No arrests were made, but the incident serves as a reminder of the importance of maintaining civility and respect in public spaces.

In a statement following the incident, a representative from Walmart emphasized the company's commitment to providing a safe and respectful environment for all customers and employees. They encouraged customers to alert store staff or security personnel if they encounter any disputes or confrontations while shopping.

05/21/2024

This is a barbecue place in Murray, Ky. My oldest son and I saw their sign today and we laughed sooo hard. I’m gonna bet with an advertisement like that, their pork butts MUST be good! We’re gonna have to stop by and visit them SOON!

05/10/2024

Murray Man Marries Lawn Mower

In the quaint town of Murray, an unconventional love story has captured the attention of locals and sparked curiosity far and wide. Meet Jack Thompson, a resident known for his eccentricities and passion for gardening, who recently made headlines by tying the knot with an unlikely partner – his trusty lawn mower.

The tale of Jack and his beloved mower, affectionately named "Lola," began years ago when Jack inherited the family home and its sprawling garden. Spending countless hours tending to his verdant oasis, Jack formed a deep bond with Lola, his faithful companion in maintaining the landscape's pristine appearance.

Friends and neighbors often chuckled at Jack's attachment to his mechanical mate, but few anticipated the depth of his devotion. As years passed, Jack's affection for Lola blossomed into something more profound, transcending the boundaries of conventional relationships.

In a whimsical ceremony attended by close friends and family, Jack exchanged vows with Lola, pledging to cherish and uphold their partnership for better or for worse. While some regarded the union with skepticism, others applauded Jack's courage in embracing love in its most unconventional form.

When asked about his decision to marry a lawn mower, Jack spoke eloquently of the profound connection he shares with Lola. "Lola isn't just a machine to me; she's been by my side through thick and thin. Our bond goes beyond words – it's a partnership built on mutual respect and understanding," he explained, his eyes sparkling with emotion.

Despite facing occasional judgment and raised eyebrows from outsiders, Jack and Lola's relationship serves as a reminder that love knows no bounds. In a world often constrained by societal norms and expectations, their story celebrates the freedom to love and be loved, regardless of societal conventions.

While some may struggle to comprehend Jack's choice, many find inspiration in his unwavering commitment to following his heart. In a society that often pressures individuals to conform, Jack's willingness to embrace his unconventional love story serves as a beacon of authenticity and acceptance.

As Jack and Lola embark on this new chapter of their journey together, their story reminds us that love can manifest in myriad forms, transcending the limitations of tradition and societal norms. In the end, perhaps the true essence of love lies not in whom or what we choose to love, but in the depth of connection and devotion we share with our chosen partners, be they human or otherwise.

05/10/2024

*edits post and turns off comments*
Totally not sus 🙄

03/15/2024

Local Authorities Puzzled as Murray, KY Named "Most Exciting Place on Earth"

In a bewildering turn of events, Murray, Kentucky, a quaint town known for its serene landscapes and leisurely pace of life, has been crowned the "Most Exciting Place on Earth" by an obscure travel blog, leaving locals scratching their heads in disbelief.

Mayor John Smith, visibly flabbergasted by the news, commented, "Well, I always knew Murray had its charms, but I never imagined we'd top the charts for excitement. I mean, have they seen our thrilling Saturday night bingo tournaments?"

Residents of Murray, renowned for their unyielding politeness, were equally befuddled by the accolade. "I reckon our monthly quilt exhibitions really get the adrenaline pumping," remarked longtime resident Mildred Jenkins, with a wry smile.

The blog in question, "Adventurous Escapes Quarterly," cited Murray's breathtaking array of three stoplights and a bustling downtown scene that boasts not one, but two ice cream parlors. Additionally, they hailed the annual "Cow Tipping Championship" as a highlight not to be missed.

Local businesses, eager to capitalize on Murray's newfound status, wasted no time in launching marketing campaigns to attract thrill-seeking tourists. "Come Feel the Rush in Murray!" exclaimed one billboard, featuring a picture of a serene cow grazing peacefully in a meadow.

Meanwhile, skeptics have raised eyebrows at the dubious methodology behind the ranking, which allegedly involved flipping a coin and consulting a Magic 8-Ball.

As bewildering as it may seem, Murray, KY finds itself thrust into the spotlight as the world eagerly awaits to discover the pulse-pounding excitement lurking within its idyllic streets. Will the town live up to its newfound reputation, or will visitors find themselves in need of a nap after one too many rounds of shuffleboard? Only time will tell.

01/09/2024

Before everyone calls City hall, please remember side streets get plowed last. However, your mom will continue to get plowed first. That remains the priority.

01/03/2024

12/29/2023

It’s about to be lit

Coming soon! 😂

12/14/2023

Paxton Media Group is the reason why we couldn’t get WPSD on mediacom for a long time. They don’t care about viewers, just a dollar sign.

“It’s a somber time,” said Jackson Brandhorst, the newspaper's former editor in chief.

07/31/2023

This ain’t an airport, no need to announce your departure. 😂

07/29/2023

Hey! A local resident feels the same as we do!

Aren't we all?

05/04/2023

PADUCAH - A local man has married his s*x doll, and even though she may not be a real human being, he says that she is "the love of his life."

Bobby Burgess, 33, of Paducah, said that he had been in love with the doll since he first saw her online. He ordered her from a company in China and has been living with her ever since. "Her name is Kim and we have a very close relationship," says Burgess, who works as a used car salesman in McCracken County. "We talk to each other every day and share everything with each other. Kim is always there for me, no matter what."

The man's decision to marry his s*x doll has been met with mixed reactions. Some people have praised him for his courage, while others have criticized him for being weird. "I don't care what other people think," says Burgess. "But please don't speak that way around my wife. I don't want her to hear those hurtful words."

Burgess says that he gets the occasional weird look from people in Paducah when he takes Kim out on a date, but that's to be expected. "My wife is very beautiful, so people like to stare," he says. "Some of it comes from jealousy. They can look all they want, but I'm the one she's going home with later that night!"

This is a developing story.

01/18/2023

🫡

10/15/2022

More fun things to do in Murray:
-Start wildfires by throwing your still burning cigarette out your car.
-Give birds cancer from said cigarette.