Metroplex Mediation

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Metroplex Mediation

Christian mediation services Gary Moates, J.D., Director of Metroplex Mediation, is a Christian mediator-conciliator-attorney and certified biblical counselor.

Metroplex Mediation provides Christian mediation services aimed at facilitating settlements for parties involved in a broad range of legal, personal, and financial disputes, including family, church, business, trusts, probate, real estate, personal property, oil and gas, contracts, intellectual property, personal injury, interpersonal matters and others. Gary is a graduate of the University of Tex

as at Austin McCombs School of Business and the University of Houston Law Center. Casey Ware, J.D., is a Christian mediator-conciliator-attorney. Casey is a graduate of the University of California Los Angeles and the University of Texas School of Law. Gary and Casey have 47 years’ combined legal experience. Both are trained in Christian mediation and conciliation by Peacemaker(R) Ministries. Additionally, Gary has been certified in mediation by Dispute Resolution Services of North Texas, Inc. and is qualified for court appointment. He has received certification in biblical counseling from the Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary Riley Center and the Biblical Counseling Institute. It is our sincere belief that Christian mediation affords parties the most effective means available for achieving highly satisfactory results with regard to resolving both personal and material issues involved in a dispute. By integrating biblical principles, we strive to transform the mediation process from a largely adversarial process in which the parties are pressured to make concessions, into a process that honors God by restoring and protecting relationships and exploring creative solutions aimed at meeting the parties’ needs in a meaningful, tangible way. It is our experience that parties to Christian mediation report a much greater level of real and lasting satisfaction with the final results than can be achieved in other settings. We encourage the pursuit of settlement through mediation at any stage in a dispute. Mediation is available both prior to and after the commencement of litigation, and may be conducted with or without the involvement of attorneys. Metroplex Mediation seeks to involve each party’s church throughout the mediation process. When one of you has a dispute with another believer, how dare you file a lawsuit and ask a secular court to decide the matter instead of taking it to other believers! Don’t you realize that someday we believers will judge the world? And since you are going to judge the world, can’t you decide even these little things among yourselves?…If you have legal disputes about such matters, why go to outside judges who are not respected by the church?...Even to have such lawsuits with one another is a defeat for you. (1 Cor. 1-7a)

The Process
Pre-Mediation:

Prior to mediation, we meet with each party individually. During the individual meetings, we obtain basic information, determine the general nature of the conflict, and examine any previous attempts at resolution. At that time we also provide details about the Christian mediation process, respond to questions, provide and explain the Christian Mediation Agreement to be signed by the parties and arrange for payment of the pre-mediation and mediation fees. Location

Mediations may be conducted at any site located in or out of the Dallas – Fort Worth area on which the parties agree, including our Bedford, Frisco and Fort Worth offices, a church, a party’s or attorney’s offices, the Fort Worth Club conference facilities, airport or hotel conference facilities, etc. If the mediation occurs at a location other than Metroplex Mediation’s Bedford, Fort Worth or Frisco offices, the facility costs, if any, will be equally divided among the parties. If the mediation occurs at a location over 50 miles from our Bedford office, charges for travel time and expenses will be equally divided among the parties. Contact: [email protected]
817/571-4110

“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.” (Ephesians 4:31)

METROPLEX MEDIATION’S POSITION STATEMENT ON DIVORCE MEDIATION

Metroplex Mediation has no ecclesiastical authority over the parties to a prospective divorce. Only the church can exercise discipline. If the husband and/or wife are involved in conduct or actions leading to church discipline, only the church can administer that discipline. Metroplex Mediation will always advise toward reconciliation; however, it’s a fact of life that people will still disregard their church’s admonition not to divorce. Even these marital conflicts, however, can benefit from Christian mediation. Marital conflict impacts more than just the parties. Children, extended family, friends and church members all suffer when divorce occurs. By providing help to couples who seek divorce, Metroplex Mediation can continue to offer help through biblical guidelines and principles for conflict resolution, perhaps helping pave the way for faster healing of relationships and helping one or both parties work toward spiritual maturity. Couples seeking assistance for divorce strictly through their attorneys find the process only grows in animosity. If couples are willing, Christian mediation could hopefully allow for a resolution of the necessary issues in a way that parties begin to put into practice the interactions that are most likely going to continue into the future. While the couple may never reconcile functionally, personal reconciliation might be possible in the future. Such conciliation, even in divorce, might even lead to complete reconciliation. God can and does change hearts. We will explain to the parties that conciliation is about seeking reconciliation, and this applies to marriage as well. God’s desire is for marriage partners to remain united and not seek divorce except in specific situations; therefore, a mediator will emphasize hope for reconciliation at appropriate times and in a gracious manner. We will advise the parties that the exceptions mentioned above are not determined by the mediator; it is the responsibility of the church pastor/leaders of the church that the parties attend. We will ask permission to speak to the parties’ church regarding mediation assistance for the couple. If the parties’ church does not support the mediation-- because they oppose the divorce and the parties are disregarding this counsel—Metroplex Mediation will share the following with church leaders: (i) the purpose and goals of working with the couple, articulating the above guiding principles for the mediator’s work, and (ii) assistance through Christian mediation often helps reduce the animosity naturally created by two parties seeking to do as much as possible to prove one person wrong and the other right. Christian mediation in divorce situations hopefully allows for a resolution of necessary issues in a more conciliatory manner helping parties put into practice the interactions that are likely to continue into the future. While the couple may never reconcile (or even be able to) in the future, personal reconciliation might happen later even if functional reconciliation does not. Metroplex Mediation’s preferred approach is to provide Christian mediation while continuing to encourage reconciliation and pointing the couple to Scripture and seeking to work with the church in promoting any restorative church accountability the church pursues.

10/05/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - ROBBED

In this broken world, we all experience unwanted loss of some kind. Something or someone has been forcibly taken from us. We feel robbed. Sometimes the loss is intangible. It may be our peace of mind, our sense of well-being, or our state of "normal." Other times the loss is more tangible - the loss of a job, a decline in health, the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship. It hurts. Sometimes to the point that we don’t know how we can face another day.

In one of Jesus’ many teachings, he relayed an illustration that is now commonly known as the parable of The Good Samaritan. In this story, we learn of a man who was traveling, only to encounter a vicious attack: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead,” (Luke 10:30-32, NIV).

Jesus offered very few details about this man. We don’t know his name, his hobbies, his background or his profession. We do know that he was hurt – and hurt badly. He needed to be rescued. He needed to receive care. He needed to be made whole again.

Final Thoughts

I’ve experienced times of pain and brokenness. I’m sure you have too. Even as I write this, my heart weeps as I think of dear families and friends who have been robbed of something very precious to them. As I ache over their suffering, I know there are many others whose names and identities are not known to me, much like the man we read of in this parable. As a follower of Christ and one who has been commissioned to “love my neighbor as myself,” I know I am called at a deeper level to pursue wholeness and peace – not just for myself, but to also lend a hand to others who are broken and hurting, too.

I confess. I don’t know all this entails. Still I believe peace and healing is possible as I apply the principles of the Path of a Peacemaker: ascending (going to the Father), reflecting (examining my heart and role in the situation), and connecting (in God’s timing, partnering with the other person to bring about a healthy resolution to the situation). Do you want to see hearts mended and lives restored? Do you long to bring a message of hope and peace to a hurting world? Then come with me. Together let’s walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation,net

08/10/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - MUCH ADO ABOUT WHAT TO DO

There are few things as simple, straightforward, or timeless as the Golden Rule: “So in all things, do to others what you would have them do to you,” (Luke 7:12a, NIV). Even though Jesus’ words couldn’t be any clearer, the Golden Rule is probably among the most misquoted verses in all of Scripture. Many believe Jesus actually instructed us to “do to others as they do to you” – a vastly different proposition, indeed!

While there are many examples in Scripture of people who faithfully followed the guidance and example of our Savior, there are others who opted for more of a “do to others as they do to you” mentality. Such was the case for Esau, the brother of Jacob. While there’s no question that he did himself no favors with his own unwise decisions, he also suffered much as a result of the deception, lies, and misguided ambitions of his mother and brother (Genesis 25:29-34; Genesis 27:1:41).

Deeply wounded by the betrayal of his family, the Scriptures tell us that Esau held a grudge. With a heart ripe for revenge, he seized an opportunity to retaliate against his parents in a way that was sure to cause them much heartache and pain: “Now Esau learned that Isaac had blessed Jacob and had sent him to Paddan Aram to take a wife from there…. Esau then realized how displeasing the Canaanite women were to his father Isaac; so he went to Ishmael and married Mahalath, the sister of Nebaioth and daughter of Ishmael son of Abraham, in addition to the wives he already had,” (Genesis 28:6a, 8-9, NIV).

Final thoughts

It’s extraordinarily difficult to “do to others what you would have them to do to you” – to love without limits, to extend grace instead of holding a grudge, to seek reconciliation instead of retaliation. Trust me, I know. At times I have hurt others, and at times, others have hurt me. No matter my role in the conflict, there are occasions when I have either struggled or altogether failed to respond with the kindness in keeping with a committed follower of Christ.

The great news is that our Father doesn’t expect you or me to do this in our own strength. Instead He invites us to come to Him, then as our hearts are touched by His grace, He empowers us to extend and receive the same love and forgiveness that He has so freely given to us. Following in the compassionate footsteps of our Savior will take a lot of patience and resolve, but is worth the effort. Walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

08/06/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - WHATEVER IT TAKES

I’ll do whatever it takes to achieve my goal. While there’s no doubt that the self-sacrifice, determination, and hard work implied by such a statement are all commendable attributes, doing “whatever it takes” isn’t always a recipe for success. It just might be a recipe for disaster.

Take for example Rebekah and Jacob’s crafty plot to deceive an old man and defraud a young man of his rightful blessing (Genesis 27:1-40). In those days, it was customary for the father to bestow a blessing on his oldest son before his departure from this earth. Sensing that his time was near, Isaac called for his oldest son, Esau, and asked him to go hunting and prepare a meal for him so that he could impart the blessing.

Overhearing this conversation, Rebekah sprang into action. She pulled aside her son, Jacob, and offered the details of her plan. It involved killing a couple of goats, preparing a meal to Isaac’s liking, and Jacob disguising himself as his brother. Jacob was worried that the plan might blow up and that his father would curse him, not bless him. Still, his mother urged him to move forward with the plan: ‘“My son, let the curse fall on me. Just do what I say…”’ (Genesis 27:13, NIV).

Rebekah and Jacob didn’t just come up with a plot. It was a calculated and carefully contrived conspiracy. They were willing to do whatever it took to get the blessing, and they succeeded in achieving their goal. While their misguided ambition and manipulative actions may have brought them short-term success, they also set themselves up for long-term disaster.

Final thoughts...

There will always be those who are motivated to get what they want, and will do almost anything to achieve it – even if it means compromising their values or mistreating others. While these tactics may move a person closer to an immediate goal, many times it results in lasting detrimental consequences for the relationship.

There may be some of us who have created heartache for others by doing whatever it took to achieve our objectives, and some of us have been hurt by the manipulative or deceptive actions of others. Even though the wounds are deep and the healing process is hard, peace is possible. If those who are hurt will go to the Savior, they can surrender their pain and brokenness. Those who have caused the offense can examine their own hearts and make peace with God before doing the same with a brother or sister. If our hearts are willing, our Father can help us move forward on the difficult – but rewarding – path to forgiveness. Take one step at a time. Walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

07/20/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - TAKING ADVANTAGE OF OPPORTUNITIES . . . OR OTHERS?

Many a success story has been the result of someone who was willing to seize the day, strike when the iron was hot, and open the door when opportunity knocked – but, are there times when passing up a chance of a lifetime is the better choice?

I think the answer to this question becomes clear in one notable interaction between Jacob and Esau. After a long day of hunting, Esau returned home weak and famished only to be greeted by the smell of the savory stew Jacob had prepared. Rather than acting with compassion, Jacob exploited the plight of his brother. Although he did offer Esau something to eat, it came with one demand: the birthright must be given as payment for the meal. ‘“Look, I am about to die,”’ Esau said. ‘“What good is the birthright to me?”’ But Jacob said, ‘“Swear to me first.”’ So he swore an oath to him, selling his birthright to Jacob,” (Genesis 25:31-33, NIV).

Jacob wasn’t simply making the most of an opportunity – he had become an opportunist. Motivated by self-serving interests, he was willing to abandon the virtue of brotherly love for his own personal gain. He pursued a goal to the detriment of his principles, which resulted in a relationship that was deeply compromised and undermined.

Final thoughts...

Aspirations are noble. Ambition is commendable. Achievements are laudable. Yet, we would do well to pursue our goals in a way that ensures we are taking advantage of opportunities – not the ones around us.

Has conflict entered your space as a result of the opportunistic choices of others? Take it to the Father. Open your heart, and surrender it all to Him – the pain, the bitterness, the fallout. When you’re ready to work on the relationship, take one step… then take another. You can do it. Walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

05/11/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - THE BLAME GAME

He started it. It’s all her fault. This would have never happened if you hadn’t… If you’ve ever uttered words like these before, you’ve played the game. There are countless ways to play, and lots of ways to score big points, but no good way to win. It’s called “the blame game.”

The game made its debut on a day when life couldn’t have been better, sweeter, or more peaceful. Yet, despite the beauty of their home in the garden, the first couple was seduced by Satan and took a detrimental step into the very thing that each one of us battle every day – sin.

Adam and Eve listened to an unfamiliar voice, instead of the voice of their Maker. They trusted themselves and their own judgment, rather than trusting the One who gave them life and breath. Then, when their Creator confronted them, it was game time: “The man said, ‘The woman you put here with me – she gave me some fruit from the tree and I ate it,’ Then the Lord God said to the woman, ‘What is this you have done?’ The woman said, ‘The serpent deceived me, and I ate,”’ (Genesis 3:12, NIV).

It’s been thousands of years since this incident occurred, but little has changed. When confronted with an unpleasant or inconvenient truth, generally our default reaction is to point fingers, cry foul, or shift blame to whomever or whatever comes to mind. While some might lean toward “the-devil-made-me-do-it” argument made popular by Eve, still others, like Adam, will blame the other person, or even subtly imply that God had something to do with their failures.

Final thoughts…

Whenever conflict enters our space, sometimes our initial tendency is to play the blame game – a game in which, sadly, no one wins. Too often, it seems our first reaction isn’t our best. Yet, if we’ll quiet our hearts and invite our Heavenly Father into the moment, it gets easier to make the counter-intuitive choice to stop the noise in our heads and manage the visceral responses.

It’s when we look to our Savior, who stood in our place and took the blame for our own sins, that we can more clearly reflect on and take responsibility for the condition of our own hearts - our own actions. After that, we can reach out to others and make things right again.

Want to live at peace with others? Then the blame game is not for you. The alternative isn’t always easy, but it is simple. Walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

04/27/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - DEFINING MOMENTS

We all have defining moments – snippets in time that determine whether the trajectory of a dream, a pursuit, a job, or a relationship will change for the better or for the worse. Our defining moments are often accompanied by tough choices, much like the ones the prodigal’s father had to make the day his wayward son returned home.

Others in this father’s position might have chosen rejection, retaliation, retribution, or a variety of other ill-advised responses. Yet, motivated by his desire to restore the relationship with his son, this father welcomed home his long-lost son with open arms.
Just imagine the impact of that moment! Instead of a cold shoulder, the prodigal was wrapped in a warm embrace. Instead of justice, he received mercy. Instead of a lecture, he experienced love.
This defining moment between the prodigal and his father was marked by grace. The father didn’t focus on the past. He focused on the future. He didn’t dwell on what was lost. He focused on what he had gained – his dear son.

This father's response to his son was motivated by love – the kind of love described here: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails…” (I Corinthians 13:4-8a, NIV)

Final thoughts…

Are you facing some defining moments in your relationships? Go to the Father. Examine your heart. Then ask yourself these questions: What do I want most? Retribution? Reimbursement? Revenge? A restored relationship?

It won’t always be easy to choose the latter, but by God’s grace, it is possible. The journey to peace may be filled with great challenges, but with even greater rewards. Together, let’s walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

04/20/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - A REPENTANT HEART

Many stories have been told, many songs have been sung, and many sermons have been preached about the prodigal son and his wayward heart (Luke 15:11-32). Regrettably, this young man abandoned his father, his brother, his home, his responsibilities, and his values. Yet, for all his mistakes and misjudgments, he eventually demonstrated a quality that is much less common – a repentant heart.

I do not aspire to this young man’s early rebellious and foolhardy choices, and I certainly hope that I never have to face the proverbial prospect of sharing slop with pigs before I repent. Still, sometimes I wonder how close I have come to a similar scenario. How many times, in my stubbornness and pride, have I been willing to do anything and everything but to right a wrong?

If you’re like me, then you know it’s not easy to admit to being the one who blew it, who overreacted, who overstepped the boundaries. It’s often harder still to make things right – first with God, and then with the brother or sister whom we have offended.

I think most of us would admit that, at one time or another, we have fallen short. We have failed. The good news is that, like the prodigal, our final journey does not have to take us far from home. Instead, we can make the choice to take the path of humility and repentance that leads us home… to the Father, to the fellowship of loved ones, to forgiveness.

Dealing with lingering relational strife? Struggling with regrets? The prodigal found the path to peace. We can too. Walk the path.

Up Ahead on “The Path”…

Over the next few weeks, we'll take a look at the prodigal's father and older brother, and take time to reflect on some important questions. What motivates us to forgive? What stands in our way? As always, I hope you'll keep reading and sharing The Path of a Peacemaker blog!

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

04/13/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - FROM THE OBSCURE TO OBVIOUS

If you’ve ever searched your home from top to bottom for something, there’s nothing more aggravating than finding that what you’d been desperately searching for was right in front of you the whole time. I don’t know about you, but this has happened to me – and on more occasions than I care to admit!

It’s strange, but there are times when that which should be obvious becomes oddly obscure. Over the past few weeks, we’ve been following the two men on the road to Emmaus who encountered Jesus along the way. As they reflected on His gruesome death and unusual disappearance, Jesus walked and talked with them, explaining the Scripture and expounding what the prophets had foretold concerning His own death and resurrection.

Later, Jesus and his traveling companions sat down to eat a meal. Taking the bread, “…[Jesus] gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them. Then their eyes were open and they recognized him…” (Luke 24:30b-31a, NIV).

As the two travelers took time to share a meal with the Savior, the words of Scripture penetrated their hearts, and their eyes were open. That which had been so confounding, was now crystal clear. Jesus was the fulfillment of all the prophets had declared in Scripture. He was their Messiah, the King of kings, the Lord of lords.

Final thoughts…

So many times when our hearts and minds are encumbered by confusion or the cloud of conflict, the most apparent solutions are often hidden from our view. Yet, when we make our first priority spending time with our Savior, opening the Word, seeking the Father’s heart, and listening to the Spirit’s voice, many times we’ll find that our understanding of God’s guidance in these circumstances can move from obscure to obvious.

As you walk the path to peace in your relationships, I urge you to ask the Lord to help you move forward with your eyes wide open. Call on Him to help you see things the way He sees them – to expound His Word in your heart and to give guidance to your steps. As you do, I believe that you will gain His wisdom and insight as you walk the path.

“If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you,” (James 1:5, NIV).

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

04/11/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - WHAT THINGS?

If God knows the past, the present, and the future, what things do we need to tell Him? If He knows us better than we know ourselves, why take everything to Him in prayer?

As we process through those questions, let’s go back a few thousand years and rejoin the two men who traveled that infamous road to Emmaus. As they walked and talked, their conversation was consumed by the extraordinary events surrounding the death of Jesus and the mysterious disappearance of His body from the tomb.

When Jesus joined these men on the way, He asked them to tell Him about what they were discussing. Confounded by Jesus’ inquiry, one replied, “Are you the only one visiting Jerusalem who does not know the things that have happened there in these days?” (Luke 24:18b, NIV)

In response, Jesus offered this one simple question, “What things?” (Luke 24:19a, NIV). Jesus wasn’t after information. He didn’t need it. Instead, He desired relationship. He wanted to gain their trust. He longed to help them process what was going on in their lives.

Final thoughts…

Still today, Jesus joins us in our journey. As we walk and talk with others, He is eager to be more than a spectator to what is taking place in our lives. Instead, He wants to be invited into our conversations, to hear our questions, to speak into our circumstances. Whether we are facing triumphs or trials, the Spirit of God gently whispers to our hearts, “What things?”

Is there something on your heart? Don’t hold back. Tell the Lord about your troubles. Invite Him into your moments of celebration. Allow Him to comfort your heart in your times of sorrow.

Through the conflict and chaos of life, the One who sees you at your best and loves you at your worst, is eager to make the journey with you. Instead of looking back, look up. He will be with you as you walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

03/30/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - WHERE IS JESUS IN MY JOURNEY?

When our lives are complicated by conflict, confusion, and chaos, sometimes it can be hard to see where God is in all of it. Even though we believe that He loves us and will never leave or forsake us, sometimes we don’t sense His presence in our lives.

If you’re struggling to see Jesus in your journey, as I have at times, let me take you back to the occasion when two of Christ’s followers were walking the road to Emmaus. It was just three days after the death of Jesus, and Cleopas and his companion were discussing all that had taken place… then, “Jesus himself came up and walked along with them; but they were kept from recognizing him, (Luke 24:15-16, NIV).

Given all these men had been through, I can only imagine how distressed and distraught their hearts must have been! Yet, in the midst of some of the most challenging moments they’d ever faced, Jesus was walking right beside them, and they didn’t even know it.

Final thoughts…

As I reflect on this profound and compelling story, my mind is filled with so many questions. How many times have I failed to see Jesus walking the journey with me? How many times has He lovingly ministered to me while I was unaware?

Just as with Jesus’ followers, in the midst of the chaos and confusion, sometimes we fail to see that the Savior is walking the journey with us. When facing relational tension or conflict, we can be sure that the One who has rescued us won’t abandon us. The One who loves us, will never leave us. In our darkest hours, deepest struggles, and most difficult conflicts – we may not always see Him, but He is right beside us. Trust that He is there, dear friend. Look to Him. Then, continue to walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

03/24/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - HOLDING HOPE

Have you ever walked through a personal or relational struggle in which it was all you could do to put one foot in front of the other? I know I have. It’s not an easy place to be. Whether you’ve walked through the valley of death, disappointment, or discouragement, sometimes it is hard to hold onto the one very powerful thing that keeps you going – hope.

As I reflect on Christ’s followers after His crucifixion, I can only imagine how troubled their hearts must have been – how heavily they were weighed down with sorrow and despair. The One in whom they had placed all their hopes and dreams was dead… buried… gone. Hopeless and heartbroken, they grieved their loss. It seemed their journey with Christ had come to a tragic end.
Thankfully, their story didn’t end there. At the cross, they tasted defeat. At the empty tomb, they experienced the risen Savior – the One who conquered death and the grave!

Final thoughts…
Last week, I urged you to stand at the foot of the cross and gaze on the grace that was so lovingly lavished on us. Today, I urge you to pause at the empty tomb and open your heart to hope. Hope that what the enemy intends for evil, God intends for good. Hope that He can make beauty out of ashes. Hope that Christ can be our all in all.

For some of us dealing with troubled relationships, or difficulties of any kind, it may feel as though hope has died – but it can live again. As we, by God’s grace, keep putting one foot in front of the other, let’s hold on to the hope that, because He lives, we can face whatever tomorrow holds. Don’t lose heart, my friend. Walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

03/16/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - REJECTED

Rejection comes in many forms. It’s getting passed over for a well-deserved, long-overdue promotion. It’s being left off the invitation list for a gathering among “friends.” Sometimes, it’s simply that feeling of being overlooked, forgotten, excluded, abandoned, ignored, or marginalized… among so many other things.

You’ve encountered rejection. So have I. Jesus dealt with it too, but in a far greater way than anything you or I could ever imagine. The prophet Isaiah describes Jesus’ experience with these words: “He was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain. Like one from whom people hide their faces he was despised, and we held him in low esteem,” (Isaiah 53:3, NIV).

Reviled and rejected, hurt and heartbroken, yet this did not deter Christ from His pursuit of peace with humanity: “…he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed,” (Isaiah 53:4, NIV).

Final Thoughts...

Restored relationships often come at a great cost. For Christ, the path to pursuing peace with humanity led Him from the throne of Heaven to a smelly stable, and later, to crucifixion on a cross, “the emblem of suffering and shame.” Sometimes the path to peace seems difficult, and the burdens we carry seem too much for us to bear. Rejection can be especially difficult to overcome – but with empowerment from the Spirit of God, not impossible.

Struggling to move forward in forgiveness? Stand in the shadow of the cross. Reflect on the gift of grace you yourself have received. Then... walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

03/09/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - PRESSURE POINTS

Sometimes the simple questions in life are the most difficult to answer. If you’re anything like me, this one has stumped me on more than one occasion: How are you?

Seems like a straightforward question, right? So, why do some of us struggle to answer it? While there may be a variety of reasons, sometimes it’s because we don’t actually know how we’re doing. Other times, we don’t really want to say. Yet, other times, it’s easier to paste on a smile and pretend things are fine than it is to be authentic.

But, there’s another possibility, too. Sometimes everything is fine… right up until it isn’t. The issues we think are resolved, are merely buried beneath the surface. The conflict that we thought we had laid to rest comes back to life once again. In a single moment, something or someone pushes a pressure point. Then, in a blink of an eye, we are transported back to a painful moment in time in which the anger, fear, and bitterness began to reside in our hearts.

Pressure points exist in relationships, and sometimes a minor trigger causes a major reaction. When these moments result in us venting out our anger and frustration at others, there’s no escaping the fact that our initial response wasn’t our best. Yet, if we’ll turn our eyes to the Father and take time to carefully examine our hearts, we’ll find there is a better way. With the Spirit of God at work in our lives, He can empower us to bridge the gap that exists in our relationships.

Final thoughts…

As you think about the conflict you’ve experienced, I have a simple question for you: how are you? How quickly do you move from being fine to feeling frustrated? How often is everything “fine” right up until the moment it isn’t?

If you’re finding that your conflict isn’t as “resolved” as you thought it was, don’t despair. The Path of a Peacemaker isn’t traveled by the few who seemingly have it all together. It is for those of us who are willing to take our hopes, dreams, struggles, failures, missteps, and everything in between to the One who knows us best and loves us most. Despite the ups and downs, don’t abandon the journey. Walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

03/02/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - WHEN TIME DOESN'T HEAL THE WOUNDS

It’s been said that “time heals all wounds.” While it’s true that the passage of time creates the opportunity for us to process pain in the aftermath of conflict, it’s equally true that time alone is inadequate to heal our broken hearts.

If you’ve ever let a stubborn splinter fester beneath your skin too long, you may have experienced the irritation, swelling, and infection that occurs when a foreign substance overstays its welcome. It’s only after the invasive object is removed that time can be instrumental in healing the injury. If the splinter is not extracted expeditiously, the passage of time will actually cause the irritation to worsen and will hinder the healing process.

In the same way, when conflict pierces our hearts, the wounds must first be properly identified and addressed before healing can begin. The more time that is allowed to pass between the offense and the administration of triage, the longer it may take for healing to occur and the greater the complications that are likely to emerge.

Final Thoughts...
If you've been thinking that time will heal your wounds, yet are struggling with the pain of past conflict, I urge you to go to our Father, the Great Physician. Let Him inside your heartbreak. Allow Him to heal the broken places. Ask Him to restore your soul. He will not only help you work through what is going on in your own heart, but He can help you take steps to restore relationship deeply impacted by conflict. This process may take time, but the first step in the journey to wholeness and peace begins with turning to the Father in our hour of distress.
Don’t delay. Walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

metroplexmediation.net

02/24/2016

THE PATH OF A PEACEMAKER - SILENT WARS

If you’ve ever been entangled in a war of words, you know just how ugly and divisive it can be. Yet, there is a different kind of war that rages in so many relationships which has the potential to be equally destructive.

It is a silent war waged with very few, if any, words at all. Instead of explosive verbal fireworks, there is quiet disengagement that results in a “flight” or “escape” response. All the while, dangerous embers of unaddressed hurt and anger quietly burn in the recesses of the heart and are manifested through attempts to avoid, ignore, and marginalize the problem or the person.

No matter whether the conflict is out in the open or just beneath the surface, escaping or fleeing from it won’t make it go away. Burying the issue – rather than eradicating it – only gives opportunity for it to surface again, disrupting our relationships. Yet, when the heart is wounded, sometimes retreating from the pain seems preferable to coping with it. When this occurs, we are likely to face a detour that takes us far from the path that leads to peace.

Final thoughts…

Because our silent wars can be masked so skillfully, we often ignore them and do nothing. Days, weeks, months, even years, come and go. All the while, hurt, indifference, or stubbornness block our resolve to restore the broken relationship.

As you reflect on this blog post in the context of your own life, here are a couple of questions you may want to ask yourself: Is there someone I’ve been avoiding, ignoring, or marginalizing? If so, could it be that there is unresolved hurt that needs to be discovered and addressed?

If we find ourselves entangled in conflict of any kind, let’s first look to Christ, then look at our own hearts. If we’re open to the Spirit’s prompting and guidance, He can help us see the best way to move toward restoration and healing. No matter the wars that are being waged, the journey to a restored relationship is possible when we choose The Path of a Peacemaker. Walk the path.

Dale Pyne - CEO
Peacemaker Ministries
peacemaker.net

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